Some days

Are there some days do you feel totally on top of your game? Allow me to post some examples:

You make all the right decisions with your kids?

You didn’t waste one minute at work?

You don’t say a cross word to your spouse?

You made time for all your friends?

You managed to make someone smile?

You said your prayers & felt right with the Lord – and the world?

Your house is spotless, laundry is done and the dinner you made was tasty & everyone ate every nibble?

Why can we not have more days like these? I looooooove these days!!
Why does it seem I have too many days that look more like this:

I yell at the kids to stop fighting and get ready before I have to come in there!!!

I space out at work and realize there is more work than I can ever get done in one day…

I snap at my husband and then ignore him when he wants to fix things just because I have too much pride.

My friends stop by to chat and I don’t stop working long enough to give them my undivided attention

I look down at the floor when I pass co-workers so I don’t have to smile or say “I’m fine, how are you?”

I forget to pray and neglect the tattoo of Matthew 5:16 on my back

I walk in to laundry that never ends & have no idea what to fix for dinner because the hamburger meat is still frozen and I forgot to buy sides at the store over the weekend.

My-my-my. Is this not why we need Jesus & His grace? As I type this I am looking at blankets all over my living room from where Bug has laid around today and I didn’t make her clean them up. Not 5 feet from me is a chair w/a load of laundry that demands my attention. The kitchen still has breakfast bowls from this morning and I need to thaw the meat for dinner. However – my Lord decided to bless me today despite myself. I logged in to my MySpace account this morning and got a message from a person I’ve never met. I almost deleted the message because I’m super suspicious after my debit card number got jacked yesterday and someone decided to buy some songs from NAPSTER. I went ahead & opened the note to read a moving letter that from a lady that had found my blogs. The letter ended with this sentence:

I just wanted to let you know that you are an amazing woman, and one whom I know God has big plans for.

Wow. I just sat there for a while. I re-read it a few times. I got to thinking about the blogs that I have marked as “Public”…there aren’t many. I have some folks that are out of my life and I want them to stay that way in every possible way so I don’t put much as “public”. So, I logged out of my MySpace account and went to my url. I did see a few “too personal” blogs out there for the public to see. And then I realized why I put those there… Not really for people I didn’t know but mainly for a woman that I knew WAS stalking my page. I wanted her to see some of what I’d written. I wanted her heart to be moved and changed. I had no clue that God would really use what I wrote to bless someone. I really REALLY didn’t expect for anyone to say I was an amazing woman. I know some amazing women that make me look like toe-cheese. I am blessed to be in the same building with some of the women I deem “amazing”.
Later this afternoon I made another “random” post because I’d felt bloggy. One of my co-worker friends posted a comment:

Amber you are an amazing woman of God and don't ever let anyone tell you differently!!

Woah – what now?! Twice in one day? Do you know what I got out of this? That God knows my heart & soul… He knows my anxious thoughts (Psalm 139:23) and knows the kind of battle I’ve been dealing with inside today & the past few days. And He thinks I’m amazing. He loves me. And He’s used these ladies to get a little of His love on me. All I have to do now is believe it.

So – I’m going to go ahead and fold up this laundry and finalize dinner plans. The husband will be home soon and I can’t wait to see his wonderful loving face. Tonight, all 4 of my babies are home and its family game night. What more can a girl ask for?

Lord, thank you for the reminder today that I’m your beloved and though I’m flawed and painfully human, your love for me doesn’t change.
~A