I Want To Ride My Bicycle...

Danny and I haven't ridden regularly since August. Though we both crave it - with my crazy (short lived) school schedule, the kids soccer games, karate, and everyday routines we haven't made time to knock out 5 miles, much less the 22 we WERE knocking out in the height of our pre-work rides. We've had a tandem we've wanted to get on for over a year. It's been collecting dust in our garage and taking up a lot of space! (Have you ever seen how much space a tandem takes up??)

Last night we decided to do something daring. We let Michiah cook the hamburger meat for the spaghetti while we threw the tandem on the trainer. For thirty minutes we were in the garage practicing our communication and rhythm. It's not easy to get two head-strong adults to pedal in the same direction without taking a break for 30 minutes. But - we are a success! And of course the girls enjoyed watching us leave sweat droplets on the garage floor so they had to jump on the bike as soon as we got off.

We are really looking forward to getting back out on the bike in the early spring. If we keep up our cadence - we'll be in tip-top riding condition by then!




Until then...

Our Little Witness

Two nights ago Caitlin came to me with a perplexing dilemma. One of the many little children that she has taken under her wings is a Jehovah's Witness. What bothered Caitlin the most by this wasn't the child's specific beliefs but her lack of participation in Christ's birthday. She didn't really understand "why" someone wouldn't celebrate the birth of our savior (ah, the innocence of youth). I tried hard to explain the best way to explain how we should show Christ love to others instead of trying to berate them with Him. How to show people you're a Christian instead of "saying" you are.
She must have heard me say "you must convert this non-believer and save her soul from hell" instead of what I obviously failed to say. Yesterday when I went to pick the girls up from the Y, Caitlin pointed to her tiny, 5 year old friend and whispered (in true Caitlin fashion) "That's her, mom!". I said "Okay, Caitlin - let's go" before it got out of hand. Michiah headed toward the bathroom to change for basketball practice and I followed her. Caitlin decided to go back and give her tiny friend a hug goodbye. I watched as she wrapped her arm around her shoulder and whispered in her ear "Now, what are you going to tell your mom?"... and I heard the little mousey voice reply "That Christmas is Jesus' birthday and we should celebrate it!".... Just then, Caitlin glanced over at me and shot me a "thumbs up" sign.
Oh mercy, I almost fell down. I found myself saying "CAITLIN! COME HERE!"... She walked over completely shocked and said "What? I just did what you told me to do!".... Appalled, I said "I DID NOT TELL YOU TO DO THAT!... I TOLD YOU TO SHOW HER CHRIST LOVE!".. Caitlin was just puzzled at this point. Then, of course, I realize that I'm not doing a good job of that myself... and I told her to go sit in the truck. I was worried about the little girl and what her family would say to her. How they would feel like she is completely misguided from their beliefs, that they may not let Caitlin play with her anymore, or better still - have a stern conversation with me about encouraging my daughter to change the belief structure of the Rutherford County school system.
As I sat in the truck trying to re-explain how best to "show" Christ love and not only "talk" about it... the tiny Kindergartners mother walked out of the building holding hands with the newly transformed child. I could see that she'd already told her mom what her "mentor" had advised her to. As they walked to her car I could see the expression on her face become stern as she spoke to her daughter. I want to believe that perhaps she was being reprimanded for something she'd done at school that day but my fear is that she had the "Jesus/Christmas" discussion and the mom disapproved.

Caitlin's boldness has never surprised me. She has been brave since the morning they pulled her a week late from my belly. I hope to find her a more effective way to plant her seeds. As a child growing up not celebrating any holidays, birthdays, etc - I know that feeling of being isolated while everyone else colored Santa pictures. I wanted desperately to feel normal and be a part of the group. I knew who Jesus was but not the same way everyone else did. I remember my Christian friends and I wish they would have handled ME a little differently. Maybe that's why I over-reacted to Caitlin's testimony. I pray that in the future the Lord gives me better words (and actions) for these situations! I guess sometimes you really do learn as you go!

Until then...

Finally Full

Ten years ago I had a new, naked Christmas tree. I went to Big Lots and the Dollar Tree to find the cheapest (and cutest) ornaments I could find to fill the bare spots. Spending $10 on a box of glass balls was a huge stretch on my wallet so we also had a lot of donations. For years I struggled to fill it with anything that would fit on a hook.

This week we struggled so much to get all of our Christmas stuff together. I almost always spend Black Friday decorating the house with my gigantic snowman collection. To stretch it into Wednesday is unheard of for us... but yet, we did. A variety of issues kept us from getting it done Friday (sleeping late, lights on the tree not working, broken decorations, you name it!) but God must have had a plan for that.
Last night we got home and began our usual ritual: baths, dinner, homework, etc. Once we had finished eating & cleaning the kitchen we flipped on AMC to find my favorite movie: Christmas Vacation. I sat down on the floor of the living room with my back to the couch and slowly peeled away the newspaper from the boxes of ornaments I have collected. Because I am blessed with family and friends that find joy in watching my eyes light up at the sight of it - I have more snowmen than I can count. I realized last night that instead of wondering how I was going to fit the bare spots I was picking and choosing what ornaments I would put on the tree and what would go back in the box. When the 6 of us had finished picking and choosing the delicate placement of our favorite ornaments I realized that what decorated our tree was nothing more than a collection of memories. Ornaments from when the kids were in Kindergarten, pre-school candy/cookie ornaments with tiny faces in the center, "Baby's 1st Christmas" stars, images of our babies with gappy smiles from losing front teeth, gifts from grandparents and aunts, and a large snowman family ornament with all 6 of our names stitched on their hats.
I realized I had leftover "filler" that I couldn't fit on the tree this year. Plain glass bulbs, snow flakes, ribbon, other random things... all to give the appearance of fullness. I sat and stared at my tree with an overwhelming sense of love. Our memories are hanging on the family tree for all to see. We didn't have to fake it anymore...it was full of our love and memories. I found myself misty eyed as I realized the outpouring from our kids and the past we've had with them. I tried so hard to drink it all in and not let the moment slip away.
Once we had taken one too many pictures and irritation sat in... I had the kids sit at the table so we could open their Advent calendars. We have always done a Christmas countdown but what could be better than popping open a little door to find a small square of German chocolate? Twenty-four pieces of chocolate in the month of December sounds like Christmas to me!

And how to solve the dilemma of too many ornaments? Another tree, of course... So this weekend we will take a trip to the store to get another cheap, skinny tree to fit neatly in our dining room. I may even agree to colored lights this time! I never thought we'd be a "two" tree family. Our cup runs over.

Tonight is basketball practice for Michiah and her first game is Saturday. I'm looking forward to seeing just how keen her Air Jordan skills are! With her long lanky legs and long arms the other team won't have a chance...


Until Then...

Little Time

There are times you feel like writing... and times you feel like you have no words at all. I know I'm full of words most of the time but don't often know how to articulate the feelings correctly. There are times I wonder if there are even words in the English language that define my emotions.

It's that time of year again... Christmas time. The older I get the harder it is for me to get in the Christmas spirit. This is backwards, isn't it? With children, I should be elated at the thought of their happy faces and, though I am, I guess the stress of getting to that point drowns out the "joy". This year (like every year) I have made a vow to enjoy this season with my family. Bake for my neighbors, put up my Christmas tree, and love on my family as much as possible.
Last night, we got our 3 year old tree out of its box. After about 45 minutes of fluffing and parting the branches just right ...Danny plugs up the tree only to discover that it doesn't work. A three year old tree - the lights are blown. Last year, the center ring of the tree burned out so last week I bought a small box of white lights to go in the center. Looks like we'll be buying another box to go with that this year!
I think another reason I stress this time of year is I know it's going to go so quickly. It's already December 1st. Where did 2009 go? When I think of how quickly these 4 weeks will pass part of me stresses but another part of me is overwhelmed by wanting to capture each moment and not let go. Remembering that my kids are only 10, 9, 8 and 6 once in their lives. Remembering that this may very well be THE last year "Santa" comes to our house.
Michiah will be 9 next month. The past few weeks I've had questions to jar my core like "Mom, what is a lesbian?" to name one. Painful reminders that she's growing up. Last night she asked if I believed in Santa. "Of course" I said. She said - Well, kids in my class thing he's dumb. Always looking for a teachable moment I said "Well, believe what you want and never let anyone change your mind. People think believing in Jesus is stupid - but does that stop you?"
"Nope", she said.
Then, realizing I compared believing to SANTA to believing in Jesus... I had to throw in the fact that we all believe lots of things that others will disagree with or think are dumb. It's up to us to hold fast to what we believe to be true in our hearts.

Parenting. Sheesh.

Well, tonight Caitlin will be rushed to Karate with moments to spare while Michiah and I take a trip to the grocery store. She is my favorite little shopper. She's always eager to help! I did learn that I can't send her and Danny to the store together though. They both like to buy things we don't need! =)

And I'll be aware the entire time... that this is the only December 1st, 2009 I'll ever have with my family. We will only have our kids around a short while and - as I recently heard - "You only get one childhood". If you really think about that, it will change you.

Unitl Then...

It's Time

Man I've been away a while... since Spring Break?! Seriously? Where have I been. Well, I'm back now and we'll just leave it at that. Back in the saddle, as they say.

Ready to kick this blog back in to high gear ...so, be on the lookout!

A Break for Spring

What a better way to welcome Springtime than to let the kiddos off school for a week? I can think of no better reward for surviving months of education than to be out with a week of gorgeous weather. Mr. Wonderful and I always find a way to take some time off during this mini-holiday. This time I was assigned Monday & Tuesday.

Yesterday, neighbor kids of all ages flooded our backyard to play on the play land, pick 3 leaf clovers & try to make it 4, throw dirt, play tag, dig for "crystals" (that I had to convince them wasn't worth money), and - of course, lots & lots of screaming & running. *Ah-childhood*

Today, the brave Aunt Lee is coming to get the 3 girls for Mani-Pedi's (yes, you read that right). That leaves me with the boy! And, as I've mentioned before...he's much different than the girls. Since it's really not kosher to take an 8 year old boy for a mani-pedi, I've given him the option to spend the day w/his fantastic step-mom....doing whatever he wants to do.

Anyone care to take a stab at this?

Of course. Chuck-E-Cheese. A pocket of tokens and no one to share them with? Yes please.

So, when Aunt Lee comes over - the boy & I will sneak off to Chuck's house. What's better is the girls have no clue. It's our little secret!! He did mention at the kitchen table last night that today was going to be the "best day ever"... It would be even sweeter if he didn't say that all the time...lol.

On another note, I decided to kick it up a notch at the gym - and I'm in some pain y'all. The Y has this thing called the "Wellness Key". It's basically a mini-electronic-personal trainer. You plug it into a machine and it tells you what to do.
Well.
Lemme tell ya - I was feeling good about what I was doing in the gym until this morning and realized - I am still far from "in-shape". HOLY COW! It made me walk on the treadmill for 10 mins at 3.6 straight. No big deal...a little sweaty, but not hard. Then - it told me to get on the weights. That's where the abuse began. It kicked up my weights by almost triple... HOLY-MOTHER I am hurting. And sore! And my butt muscles are burning...even as I sit & type this!
So ...this will be my new routine for a few weeks. Well, every-other-day I'll do that routine and on the off days, I get what's called "free time"...oh-boy! I wonder if they'll let me nap in the weight-room!

Alright...better get up & find out what the vacationers would like for breakfast. Yesterday was all-you-can-eat pancake breakfast. I'm thinking this morning is cinnamon rolls or banana bread - & eggs. *mmmm*

I'm an Aun-Tee!!

Who knew that Sunday, March 15th would change my life forever? I woke up (suuuper tired) for church like any other Sunday. Mr. Wonderful got the girls some breakfast and I grabbed a groggy shower. I checked my phone to make sure I hadn't missed any phone calls from my (super pregnant, due anytime) sister.

Nope! All clear.

I did notice that my phone was going dead. I ran downstairs to plug it up for a few minutes before we left for church. Welp, as "out of sight, out of mind" goes - I left my phone at home. We got to church (late) and I started to panic.
"What if she goes into labor today???"

Danny tried to comfort me & even joked about heading back home to get it. I decided we were ok and we just went in to worship the Lord.

Little did I know - my sister had been in labor for a bit. We left the house - headed to Praise the Lord - at 9am and she began calling at 9:20.

We left church, oblivious to the fact my niece was ready to make her appearance, and headed to O'Charley's with Danny's parents. We took our time eating lunch, ran by the tanning bed afterwards (where I had to wait for a bed) and then ran over to GNC to see about some herbal products that may help me build muscles and lose fat. As I walked back out to the truck I happened to notice my two gorgeous girls hanging out of the back of the windows with giant grins on their face. Foolishly, I thought they were happy to see me!...

I got in the truck and glanced over to Mr. Wonderful's smiling face. I knew I made him happy but - who knew I made him so smiley!

As he started the truck and began to back out he said

"Honey - Lee called"

I shot him an "OMG" look.

Lee ONLY called because she couldn't get a hold of me.

"Well, Ashley is on her way to the hospital. Her contractions are 5 minutes apart and she'll call when she gets to the hospital"

Suddenly, my sense of responsibility kicked my tail. How could I have left my phone at home? How could I have been so selfish?? Taking my time at the tanning bed, at GNC... My sister was 3 days from her due date & I'm out lolly-gaggin! I started crying. Ok - sobbing. I was the one that was suppose to call the rest of the family to let them know sis was in labor! But - no, they had to call me - THROUGH MY HUSBAND!

We rushed home and I had 4 missed calls, 3 new voicemails, and 3 text messages.

What a jerk I am.

And to top it off? I hadn't even charged my (pert-near dead) phone. I'd left it on the counter! I quickly plugged it up and started calling. Just then, my sister rang. She was at the hospital and was dilated to an 8!!!!!

Oh how I flew into panic mode.

You should know that my girls are amazing. They grabbed my camera, the camera charger, my phone charger, my purse, my car keys, and a bag of diapers. Michiah said "Ok mommy - let's go!"

I walked out the door, after a kiss & stern warning from Mr. Wonderful reminding me of the posted speed limits, and flew like a flash. We got there in PLENTY of time. By the time she'd gotten to the birthing room she dilated to a 5-6 (wasn't aware you could shrink but I know ALL about it now!)

A few hours later I was holding her left leg as Lee held her right - and we witnessed the first "non c-section" delivery between the 4 of us. Mom had 3, I've had 2, Lee has had 0 kids so...lol. That was something ELSE, lemme tell ya!!!!!!

I watched my modest sister abandon ALL HOPE of modesty and beg for someone to "get it out of there". It was incredible.

At 8:05pm I witnessed Cadence Alyssa Vadner become a part of God's plan for this world. We have NO CLUE what it is but the Lord does! I've kissed her face, held her close, and absolutely cannot wait until she comes to my house for a visit!

I'm pretty thankful that the Lord allowed me to be a part of that miracle...and I cannot WAIT to be a huge part of her life! She's already changed mine forever